Thursday, June 18, 2009

Why daddy has no friends.

I've long been aware that I don't do "other people talking" very well so this how-to win friends and influence people post from Volohk is advice I'd do well to take. 

But lets not hold our breath.

Fortunately Im married to a socially  gifted woman who is loved by all, probably because she doesn't struggle to remember people's names or birthdays and really seems interested in most of what they have to say.  Thats just not me.  Im no more likely to stop being a socially isolated dick than she is to start being one.   Its hardwiring.  Im not aware that Im making a series of  dick choices.  Im just experiencing things as they come.   Lots of people really seem kind of boring or facile in their interests and its not at all clear to me how being friendly with them would be a boon to either of us.   

1 comment:

  1. Interesting post. I really didn't have any friends until I moved to Chicago. I think drinking helped me a lot. Seriously. Sadly? At any rate.

    It's still something I have to work at, hard. I really admire people who are kind and socially generous and also intelligent and successful. That's a tough combo to pull off.

    The post is okay, but the comments below are actually better if you haven't read them yet. This was my favorite one:

    The single best advice I ever got was to let the other person talk at least half of the time in any conversation. People LOVE talking, particularly about themselves and the more you let them talk the better a conversationalists they think YOU are.

    When I was a bit older, I conceived of a larger life goal--to learn enough about any subject in the world so that, when meeting an expert in that subject, I know enough to ask an intelligent question. That goal has led to many fascinating conversations. back to my blog about tape dispensers.