Cue fan... and cue shit...

Here's the AIG contract.   It goes without saying that I don't live in a world where the word bonus gets tossed around much whether its performance or retention or whatever.  But then again almost no one lives in a world where your employer enters into a contract with you that includes language like this:

"The objectives of the plan are....

To recognize the uncertainty that the unrealized market valuation losses in AIG super-senior 

credit derivative and originally rated AAA cash CDO portfolios have created for AIG-FP employees and consultants"

Again. Not pretending to have been around that block but how can that mean anything other than AIG management knew that the bottom was falling out of CDS's in 2007 and included that language to insulate those bonuses from coming losses?

Gets worse...

Page 5 Section 3 specifically establishes bonus levels at either 100% or 75% of bonuses paid in 2007 completely irrespective of performance.

Page 10 though will really make you wish you'd chosen a different career path:

"(a ) Effect of Mark to Market Losses on the Bonus  Pool:

The Bonus Pool for any Compensation Year beginning with the 2008 Compensation Year will not be affected by the incurrence  of any Mark to Market losses ( or gains)"

The "or gains" was for appearances I presume.  It goes on to limit the level of bonus pool loss in a given year to $67 million or so.  And just to be clear this was above base salary and my guess that anybody qualifying for a million plus in bonus  scratch is probably not working for $7 an hour the rest of the year.    

Fuck me.